Friday, October 31, 2014
I'm a freaking skunk. And tonight, I'm live blogging Halloween 2014 IN THE RAIN.
7:16pm: Guys and ghouls, you may not know this but Swedish Fish are the next big thing. A black kitten and a teddy bear both declared, "I got a whole package of Swedish Fish. A whole package!" A whole package, according to the minion, contains like 5 swedish fish.
7:09 pm: A blue fairy has a deep discussion with the minion.
Minion: Hi! Which one do you want?
Blue fairy: *stares at bowl*
Minion: *points at lollipop* This one?
M: *points at Smarties* This one?
M: *points at nerds* This one?
M: *points at sour patch kids* This one?
BF: *proudly smiles* Yes!
Everyone is happy. Except me, because blue fairy didn't pick me.
6:59 pm: Zombie police officer did not arrest me for smelling bad. She didn't eat me, either.
6:48 pm: So far the most hilarious part of Halloween 2014 is the puddle in front of the minion's house. Many children have faced the puddle and have failed to successfully cross the puddle. I applaud the puddle.
6:27 pm: Guys and gals, ghosts and ghouls, this is possibly the most boring Halloween ever!! Usually by now th...oh wait, hold on. Okay, a cowboy just told my human minion (in a high pitched timbre), "You have a PUDDLE in your driveway. DID YOU KNOW THIS? You should do something about it." Haha, minion got schooled!
6:13 pm: An oversized superman toddler declared I was a DOG in a high-pitched squeal. I agreed. Then his mom kept telling him not to jump in puddles, "No! No! No puddles!" I agreed.
5:54 pm: Everyone wears masks. No one pets me. This is a day of great mourning and sads for me.
5:45 pm: No one pet me this time. NO ONE. What is wrong with these kids? Also it took a ghost 25 seconds to decide between pink nerd and purple ones. Then he grabbed the pink ones and said "purple!" Was he colorblind?
5:08: Four adorable kids arrived. I mean, I guess only three were adorable. One didn't even acknowledge my presence so obviously something wrong with him. The little princess proclaimed me a SKUNK! and then pat me on the head. That was cool.